The Business of Self-Care at BYOB
By: Jayla Moody
To end the sessions, women lifestyle entrepreneurs served on a panel about the art of self-care and how important it is to take care of yourself then your business.
Despite what the industry may push, Lakeysha Hallmon, founder of Village Market ATL, said sleep gives you the discernment to make the right decisions.
As a proud member of #teamsleep, Hallmon said she starts her day earlier than 5 a.m. sometimes, but she’s always unplugged and in bed by 9 p.m.
Fitness influencer Umama Kibria advised attendees to avoid starting their day with any stress. This can be done by planning outfits and meals the night before and giving social media a break until a certain point in the day.
Kibria has a process to guide what she does to maintain a positive relationship with social media.
She starts by first taking some time off to re-engage with her passion. When she returns back to social media, she unfollows and blocks any accounts that may make her uncomfortable or that harbor negative energy.
“If their judgment isn’t fueling you or paying your bills, let them go.”
Regardless of the brand, these women said it’s most important to invest in yourself first because it takes a healthy mind to do great business.
In 2020, the BYOB retreat will be the place to be for up and coming business owners and content creators.
Click here for Resonate with Alex Wolf at BYOB.
“Resonate” with Alex Wolf at BYOB
By: Jayla Moody
Over 2,000 content creators and entrepreneurs of color gathered in Atlanta, Georgia for Memorial Day weekend. They didn’t just gather to celebrate the holiday and the 3-day weekend, but to learn how to build their own brand.
The BYOB (Build Your Own Brand) Retreat began with a opening networking mixer on Friday night and extended to Sunday evening with a keynote speaker. In between, there were a plethora of sessions covering just about anything you needed to know to successfully brand and sell.
The women of the retreat set the tone, starting with author and social strategist Alex Wolf. In her session, Renting vs. Owning Your Audience: Building a Secure Brand (Outside of IG), Wolf emphasized the importance of authenticity in branding.
““You don’t have to do things that don’t feel right in the name of likes and followers” ”
Wolf broke down the difference between marketing and promoting during her session as well. She said promoting is projecting yourself publicly for likes, while marketing is establishing your position in the marketplace and earning the trust of your followers.
When branding, content creators and entrepreneurs should ask themselves what the message would be if they weren’t trying to sell something.
Wolf said social media should be used for socializing, but the real connections should be made in a more intimate space, like email correspondence. In order to do this, content creators have to make the algorithms a non-factor.
Instead of relying on frequent content creation, make sure there is value in your work.
“Good work doesn’t need constant resonation,” she said. “There are real artists and creatives who take time and respect their craft. That is a process.”
Wolf encouraged using the internet in more empowering ways, because quality work doesn’t have to be diluted.
Wolf published her thoughts about the topic in her book, “Resonate.”
In 2020, the BYOB retreat will be the place to be for up and coming business owners and content creators.
Click here for The Business of Self-Care at BYOB
The Bold Type
Freeform
My entire life I have been infatuated with shows about writers and magazine life. From Reggie’s Zine on Rocket Power to SJP as Carrie Bradshaw on Sex And The City to Carrie Dairies (the prequel to SATC) and Younger on TV now… It should be a surprise to no one that I am working on Aspiring Co. and writing. I am so in love with watching content about writers! That said, I still hesitate to call myself a writer. It feel like that title comes with a ton of pressure and it is something that looms over me as a creative. General imposter syndrome BS. I know it and all of its triggers and symptoms better than I would like to admit. The Bold Type is my new favorite obsession. I see myself, my friends and women I love in each of the characters pushing to find our passions and purpose, validating one another and supporting one another along the way.
The Bold Type is centered around 3 friends who work together at a magazine called Scarlet in New York City. They depict real life issues like asking for your worth at work, proving yourself in male dominated industries, and navigating tricky relationships. While I can certainly relate to these aspects, what sets The Bold Type apart is the way that they naturally add in current events. Everything from protesting Trump to the Me Too movement, the Muslim ban, and having problematic faves… This show covers everything! And not in a creepy way that feels forced or disingenuous. It is just so well done!
John Medland/Freeform
Watching Jane and her friends navigate their lives and careers feels like catching up with my own friends over drinks. Learning from their successes and failures is invaluable and I can’t recommend this show enough! If you are looking for a new favorite show, check out The Bold Type. Season 1 is on Hulu and the second season just started so it is not too late to play catch up! Catch the new episodes on Freeform (ABC Family) on Tuesdays at 8PM.
The Women of BYOB Retreat
BYOB (Build Your Own Brand) Retreat took place in Washington, D.C. during Memorial Day weekend. This retreat was designed to empower attendees with skills needed to start your own business or improve what you might already have. We had the pleasure of attending with friends to Aspiring Co. Marissa and Shelby of MRAY Co.. We attended panels and a keynote to learn from industry leaders in their perspective fields and expertise. Here are a few of our favorite parts from the two day retreat!
In a session entitled “Fireside Chat with Tonya Rapley” Tonya (Founder of My Fab Finance) and Andrew Nguyen (Founder of BYOB Society) shared their insights on money and business. Tonya shared that she moved to New York with $500 and after being in the city for a while, she learned that most of her peers (and she, herself) weren’t good with money. She sought out a way to change that and through her journey came up with My Fab Finance. One of the keys to her success that she shared was having multiple streams of revenue. She works with brands who want to attract millennials, teaches, writes, speaks and sells product as additional ways to make money. Tonya also stressed the importance of attending conferences like this one and learning as much as possible on your journey. She added that we need to fall in love with the execution as much as the learning meaning that you have to actually apply what you are learning as you get more knowledge. For those who are interested in transitioning out of their full-time job to entrepreneurship, Tonya advised the following:
1. Pay down debt.
2. Make sure you are making money before you quit.
3. Save to invest.
4. Assess your healthcare options.
5. Take advantage of learning opportunities with your full-time job before you go.
Next we attended a series of panels, Mastering the Art of Networking and Negotiating and 40 to 80 real quick: The first steps to transition from corporate to entrepreneurship. In both sessions we learned a ton. One of the things that sticks out most for me is when Kiki Ayers said, “You don’t get what you deserve, you get what you negotiate.” Studies show that as women, we tend to negotiate less than men. I know this definitely holds true for me. Negotiation is not easy but it is definitely necessary and I appreciated this simple phrase as a reminder. In the next session, Pauleanna Reid reminded us that a lot of the time, we are “asking for more when we haven’t mastered less.” I loved this concept because it is so true. We are all always looking for what is next, and asking for a larger audience but not committed to the one we already have. This is a reminder that content is key. Stay focused and committed and the growth will come.
To end the retreat, we listened to Yvonne Orji (from HBO’s Insecure) talk about her life an experiences. She shared how her faith has played a huge role in her success. When she moved to L.A. she worked on her craft and acting while working as a comedian and wedding hostess. As a comedian she learned a valuable lesson in that sometimes you bomb, but you always finish. She knew her worth and kept her standards high because she wanted to make sure she didn’t sell herself for her dreams. Her story was beyond inspiring! Yvonne stressed that nothing we do is lost. Every opportunity, every connection, every gig that we take is preparing us for the next thing.
If you are looking for an opportunity to learn from other business owners and like-minded people, we highly recommend checking out BYOB!
UNITED STATE OF WOMEN 2018 RECAP
In 2016, back when we were called Speaking of Everything, we were nominated to attend the United State of Women Summit at the White House (under President Obama’s Administration) and we were over the moon and beyond excited. That didn’t quite pan out the way we hoped, but #nevergiveup! We were absolutely honored to attend as media this year at the Los Angeles summit earlier this month. According to their mission statement, “the United State of Women is national organization for any woman who sees that we need a different America for all women to survive and thrive —and wants to work collectively to achieve it.” Obviously this is something we are completely behind and couldn’t be more thrilled to be a part of.
““We are still too grateful to be at the table to really shake it up.””
This year’s lineup was incredible! The day started with about 6,000 women sitting in Shrine Auditorium for opening remarks. One of the things that the USOW team did best was making sure that the day included all different types of women from different intersections. Black, White, Latinx, and indigenous women, trans women, the LGBTQIA+ community, women with disabilities, etc. I really appreciated the intentional diversity. We laughed, we learned, we cried. The summit was truly an incredible experience that we were extremely fortunate to witness. From Elaine Welteroth (Former Editor in Chief of Teen Vogue) to United States Senator Kamala Harris to Jane Fonda (actress and activist) to our Forever FLOTUS Michelle Obama, I am so excited to share our favorite parts.
At one point very early in the schedule, we heard from several survivors from Nassar's sexual assault crimes, including Olympian Aly Raisman, Tiffany Lopez, Jeanette Antolin, and Jordyn Wieber. The survivors shared their stories and at the end were joined by singer/songwriter FLETCHER who sang her absolutely beautiful original song,”I Believe You.” The room was overcome with such emotion. It was a moment I will never forget. Later in the day, Tarana Burke (creator of the #MeToo Movement) echoed these same sentiments and reminded us to “Be gentle with yourself. Don’t let life be consumed by the work because taking care of yourself is part of the work” and encouraged us to “Let [our] existence be resistance.”
Tarana Burke
Another highlight from the day was hearing from Ibtihaj Muhammad, Olympic medalist and the first women to represent the USA while wearing a hijab, who was joined on stage by the COO and President of Mattel. She spoke about representation and failure among other things. One of my favorite quotes of hers was “We have everything inside of us that we need to be successful and we don’t need other people’s permission to be great.” She was so proud to represent her race, religion and country at the Olympics. It was a reminder for us all to be our unapologetic selves while we strive for greatness.
Danae Edmonds and Ibithaj Muhammad
One of my favorite segments, aside from Michelle Obama, was when actress and activist Jane Fonda and Patrisse Cullors, co-founder of Black Lives Matter and author, took the stage together. They shared their personal experiences and how things are different for Americans based on race. I loved listening to them both as they opened up about their lives. Jane Fonda spoke very candidly about how her privilege allows her to experience a very different America than black people and POC. She makes it a point to use her power to call out the systematic racism and oppression that exists for many Americans. Patrisse shared about her personal experience with the police and how they treated her brother and how that sparked a lifelong commitment to the work she does now. It was great to see these two women from different walks of life come together and use their voices to make us stronger.
Jane Fonda and Patrisse Cullers
Elaine Weltheroth was joined on stage by actress Yara Shahidi, Senator Kamala Harris, and activist Brittany Packnett. It gave me chills to sit and listen to them speak. There was one part that has truly resonated with me where Senator Harris asked the audience if we had every been in a situation where we were the only one in the room who looked like us. She asked us to look around the room and remember all of the women that were there in that moment. She said that when we have those times were we feel alone, to remember that everyone that was in the room is there with us. As I look back over my life, I remember countless moments like the one she described and was grateful for this new perspective.
Elaine Welteroth, Senator Kamala Harris, Yara Shahidi, and Brittany Packnett
We ended the day with a conversation between Michelle Obama and Tracee Ellis Ross. It was a dream come true to see both of these amazing women. The Shrine erupted in applause, squeals and cheers as both ladies took the stage. From there, we all listened anxiously as two friends shared candid conversation about leadership qualities in girls and women, parenting, and what to call Michelle Obama. Pinch me because I still can’t believe we got to be there for this. The biggest takeaway for me, among many others, was when Michelle Obama said that as women “We are still too grateful to have a seat at the table to really shake it up.” A WORD! She also reminded us to be reasonable with one another and not hold ourselves and other women to standards that we don’t hold men to. She was so full of life lessons and reminded us all that everyday we get the chance to practice who we want to be.
Michelle Obama and Tracee Ellis Ross
In a world that sometimes feels futile, it was refreshing to be surrounded by thousands of likeminded women trying to make the changes we want to see. The Summit was so much more powerful than we can capture in words, but we have a video with clips from our favorite parts
On the second day, attendees got to pick different calls to action and workshops to attend. We attended two different sessions. One was held at the Writer's Guild and the other was at Marvista Studios in Los Angeles. Here is one of our favorite moments from that experience.
““You’re going to have to be uncomfortable until it feels normal.””
Overall, this was an incredible and humbling experience. We are honored to have attended and are excited to see how the future unfolds. THE FUTURE IS FEMALE.
Our team at the summit on Day 2! Danae Edmonds and Juanita Chavarro from left to right.
Travel Inspiration: Los Angeles
I get my best ideas when I am in new places or traveling to a new place. I usually find that the time I spend in route to my destination gives me my best thinking time. Lately, I have been completely obsessed with the idea of LA. Between jealously watching Instagram stories from Create Cultivate, binging Insecure for the hundredth time, and the inescapable Oscars hype, I have been California dreaming. Thankfully my wanderlust friend Amanda has been to La La Land and shared some of her favorite experiences with us! (If you have been somewhere awesome and want to share with our readers, let us know!)
Hollywood // Los Angeles
By: Amanda Bittner
Must-See: Hollywood Sign
Eat Here: Carrera Café – make your own latte art!
Fave Neighborhood: Hollywood Hills
Photo Ops: 1) Skybar 2) any of the Angel Wings murals (they’re everywhere!) 3) Hollywood Sign 4) Perch rooftop
Pro Tips
1. The Runyon Canyon Hike is steep AF! Don’t let the shirtless men running past you get you down – the view is worth it, I promise.
2. Celebrity sightings: stop searching & be patient - they’ll pop up when you least expect it! (Spotted Dennis Quaid in a cheap, dark Mexican restaurant eating chips & salsa like the rest of us peasants!)
3. The Hollywood Walk of Fame is not all it’s cracked up to be. The large mass of tourists & tacky superhero characters on the street leave much to be desired.
4. Ditch the tourist area & blend in with the cool local vibes at Skybar & Ep + Lp Lounge that feel straight out of a scene in Entourage.
5. To get a good photo right in front of the Hollywood sign (I mean RIGHT there), take a Lyft up Deronda Drive as far as it can go. They’ll reach a point where they can’t drive any further. Walk the rest of the way to the top, and voila!
6. Best mode of transportation: your gams! Walking everywhere really gives you a lay of the land, and you get to see some drop dead gorgeous Hollywood homes.
7. Decompress from the stresses of travel with a yoga class at Liberation Yoga – most beautiful yoga studio ever, and their drop-in price was super affordable!
Wish I Had Visited: 1) Dolby Theater (where the Oscars are) 2) Venice Beach 3) Chateau Marmont
HOLIDAY GIFT GUIDE
Think Oprah's Favorite Things but the Aspiring Co. version which means we are only featuring small girl powered businesses (and lots of them are previous It Girls)! At the end, we have a promo code for you to order your Aspiring Co. mug! Let's get right to it:
FOR THE HOME:
Firebrand
CANDLES
FIREBRAND Candle Company is based out of Detroit, Michigan and is created by Quinn Hamilton. While it can be hard to order something like a candle online, Quinn has a page that lists the scents and the notes in each candle.
EttaVee
Zen Succulent
GREENERY
CALLING ALL PLANT MOMS! Megan George (It Girl and plant aficionado) has a ton of options at every price point for you to get your grow on. She also has a book to help you if your plants aren't flourishing the way you want them to. Shop here.
PHOTOS & PRINTS
Shopping for your favorite GIRL BOSS's office? How about a chic room in the house? Taryn St. Michele (another badass It Girl) certainly has the piece for you. Shop photos and prints here. XO
ALL OF THE THINGS
Sassy AF drinkware, pennants, prints, etc... stop what you are doing and go to Kiwi's shop, Craft Boner. Oh and click here for her It Girl interview.
BODY BLESSINGS
koyVoca
MAKEUP
Order all the things from koyVoca Cosmetics this holiday season! 20 different shades of foundation, beautiful highlighters and the perfect nude, ALL brown girl friendly! Meet It Girl Courtney Coates and shop the product line here.
BATH & HAIR CARE
Grace Mae developed her body care brand after experiencing dry skin for the majority of her life. I have yet to try anything, but the shower steamer is in my cart because it seems luxurious AF and I need spa days every day. Shop here.
Anne's Apothecary
ALL THINGS BATH AND BODY
Anne's Apothecary is all of the things. All of them. In addition to having your skincare routine completely covered, Anne's is committed to donating full size bars of soap to a NC local homeless shelter. Shop here.
NAIL POLISH
One of my fave things to do is paint my nails. I find it relaxing and it has immediate pay off. Heather, aka Little Nail Girl is one of our earlier It Girls and she has her own brand of nail polish! Shop the 9 FREE • VEGAN • CRUELTY FREE • ECO FRIENDLY line here.
ACCESSORIES
HANDBAGS & MORE
Nikki & Mallory Handbags and Accessories by It Girl Treasure Mallory is everything you are looking for in classic, handmade purses. My favorite bag is this black crossbody because it literally goes with everything and is the perfect size. I rock mine with a tassel, which you can also get from Nikki & Mallory. Shop here.
HEADBANDS
KRZA by Krystle Dawn makes beautiful headbands and scarves that you will definitely love. She has a ton of fun prints and even mommy daughter sets. After you shop, if you still can't get enough of Krystle, read her It Girl interview.
APPAREL
APPAREL & PINS
MRAY creates beautiful tees and pins to remind you to stay carefree and unbothered. Created by Shelby and Marissa, their brand is whimsical and light. Sizes from S-XXL and guess what? Their It Girl interview will be live in December, and their new collection will be out soon!
APPAREL & MORE
Luella has stickers, pins, tees and more for every woman in your life. Their stuff is so cute and 30% off until 11/27/17. I seriously added $30 worth of stuff to my cart while trying to create this guide. Also perfect for your introvert friends, girl gang, and plant moms, sizes XS-3XL
APPAREL
buzz+poppy has a ton of cute tees and mugs for adults and kids alike. Shop their collections this holiday season.
MISCELLANEOUS
READ
It Girl Sarah Vermunt wrote an amazing and inspiring book that will literally get you all the way together. Sarah has a true gift and writes in a way that is supppper relatable but encouraging. Read her debut title Careergasm and buy it for everyone you know who could use a gentle push in the right direction.
STATIONARY & MORE
You might remember Effie's Paper Stationary and Whatnot from our special Black Girl Magic feature last February. There are a ton of cheeky sayings and phrases all over mugs, notepads and more. You will definitely be able to find the perfect gift here.
Now, go forth and spend those hard earned dollars supporting other women who are living their dreams! We are going to keep adding to this list, if you have ideas on businesses to include, send them our way on social media! @Aspiring_co on all the things!
Ready to order your Aspiring Co. mug? Click here, and use promo code SOCIAL for 10% off.
7 TIPS FOR ENTREPRENEURS by Courtney Coates of koyVoca
MASTERING BALANCE WITH YOUR SIDE HUSTLE
Having a side hustle is often romanticized, but don’t be fooled as it is not easy. Whether you are a blogger, artist, or maybe an entrepreneur, having a side hustle and a fulltime job is tough! Here are some tips and things that I do to balance Speaking of Everything and my fulltime job.
1. Prioritize
I know this seems like a no-brainer, but sometimes the simplest things are forgotten. Make a To-Do list with 3 columns. Today, Tomorrow, By The End of The Week. Ideally, you would update this daily and slowly move the By the End of the Week stuff to the other two columns to help you stay focused. Be realistic.
2. Ask For Help
You don’t always have to do things yourself. Ask friends and family for help and let go of some of the control. It's good to hear new ideas and to get other’s input.
3. Take Time For Yourself
Paint your nails, watch some trash TV, go to the gym, read for 20 minutes, catch a movie… Do things for you that don’t take long and don’t beat yourself up for stealing a minute for yourself. You have to take care of you and having time away from work will leave you feeling refreshed and more creative than ever!
4. Set Reminders
Save your brainpower by writing things down and setting reminders in your iPhone instead of attempting to remember every little thing. You will be surprised by how much gets done!
5. Keep Your Workspace Tidy
It might just be me, but I. Can. Not. Focus. if my desk is messy. Then I spend an hour and a half cleaning and forget what I was working on. Get some organizational tools to help keep your space clean so you aren’t distracted by your work.
6. Establish a Routine
Maybe Monday’s are for brainstorming, Tuesday: Scheduling content, Wednesday: Networking, etc. That way you know what to expect day after day. It is important to try and stick to your schedule as much as possible and to anticipate issues so you can work around them.
7. Carry a Small Notebook
Inspiration is everywhere and it is super important that you acknowledge it when it strikes, whether you are at your desk, on your commute or having drinks with friends be sure to have somewhere you can jot down your ideas so you don’t have to remember them. I prefer to write my down physically as opposed to using my iPhone.
I hope these tips help! Comment below with any ideas you have. We are all in this together!